So, it is almost 3AM and I was in another one of my late night/early morning productivity bursts, when I started Facebook chatting with my friend Misty (@Chi_Mist) from Chicago about her current job search and interest in working with the Chicago Blackhawks.  The question came up, “What do you think about sending a letter to them?”  Instantly a story came to my mind about my cousin, Matt, and after our conversation I realized it would be valuable for others to hear it as well.  So here it is, a TRUE story about passion, sports, and following your dreams.  Perfect for the likes of Ryan Stephens (@RyanStephens) and Gary Vaynerchuk (@GaryVee).

My cousin, Matt, is from New York and grew up a HUGE Mets fan.  He knew everything about the Mets, inside and out. In 1990/1 Matt was working for the department of defense in DC, avidly keeping up with the Mets, as always, and they were playing quite poorly.  In a state of complete frustration with the way his beloved Mets were performing and relying on the fact he heard the team’s Owner read all of his mail, he wrote a very comprehensive letter to the Owner of the NY Mets.  This letter basically laid out all of the things Matt thought the Mets were doing wrong, including why they should fire their current manager. (Keep in mind, Matt really knew the game and had legitimate explanations for his criticisms)

To Matt’s surprise, he received a letter back from the Owner with explanations and rebuttal to Matt's points and a thank you for taking the time to write.  Additionally, the offer to meet in-person was made to Matt for the next time he was back in NYC.  A few months later they fired the manager and things started to change for the Mets.  Around that time Matt had planned to visit family back in NY and thought it would be the perfect time to write back and request the in-person meeting.  A meeting was arranged for a slot of 15 minutes and Matt was set to meet with the Owner of the NY Mets!

The meeting turned into a long conversation where the owner began opening up to Matt about different issues and Matt even went on to speak with the VP and other members of the Met’s administration.  Matt recognized the perfect opportunity and asked if any positions were open within the organization.  There were no available positions but the Owner mentioned the commissioner of the MLB was asking each major league team to submit a representative as a candidate to represent the MLB in promoting baseball’s debut in Barcelona for the 1992 Summer Olympics.  He asked Matt if he wanted to be the representative for the NY Mets.

Matt went on to be selected for the position and was in charge of promoting baseball in Barcelona for the 1992 Olympics, helping to ensure its success.  All starting with a passionate letter!

Now, this is a true story, and there are some things you should consider:
1)    Matt is extremely intelligent - graduate from Duke and appear on Jeopardy and come very close to winning intelligent. (His brother also appeared on the show at a different time)
2)    He really knew baseball, specifically the Mets, inside and out which allowed him to draft compelling insights and thought-provoking statements
3)    He was full of passion for something he loved!
4)    He showed up in-person
5)    He had a bit of luck and timing on his side

Will everyone that writes a letter to a team’s manager or a company’s CEO obtain his or her dream job?  Of course not, but if you are extremely knowledgeable, passionate and show why YOU matter, you have a much better chance!  So, study harder, sacrifice more and follow your passion!  Maybe a little luck will come your way too :)
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Balance 07/13/2009
 

What is balance? Depending on its context, balance can take on a couple interesting faces:
a weighing scale
the presentation of multiple viewpoints (See Also Neutrality).
a desirable point between two or more opposite forces.
a device to measure the mass of an object.

When you look at balance as a measure in life, it is easy to get swept away in a stream of thoughts.  Is balance life’s measuring scale?  Is it the midpoint between “success” and “failure?”  And the most mysterious, how do I achieve this magical neutrality?

I often struggle with this sense of balance and generally come to the same conclusion.  My scale tends to tip heavily to the business side with significantly smaller portions of my time dedicated to “personal” time.  Whether wrong or right, this just tends to be how I net out.  Several factors contribute to my choice of allocating my time this way…yes we choose our balance and the way we allocate our time, after all, everyone has the same 24 hours in a day.  

#1 – Drive of an Entrepreneur – It is very hard for me to “turn it off” – Knowing what my lifelong goals consist of, I constantly see opportunities in from of me and choose to capitalize on as many of them as possible as they are presented.  This leads to times when I am forced to segment a portion of my “personal” free time to the mongrel of entrepreneurship!  I’m ok with that!.....at least for now

#2 – Pay now or Pay Later – relates to #1 and perhaps where my true “balance” issues enter – My justification for ridiculously working my ass off now is to reap its rewards sooner and “retire” early.  By retire I do in fact mean taking a less active role in terms of travel and workload.  I am one of those people who would go crazy sitting around all day or driving an RV across the country.  That being said, I do sometimes dream of playing golf everyday ☺ My struggle is to know this limit.  It is easy for me to see the downfall of not capitalizing on business opportunity at a young age, but I do have to remind myself of the pitfalls that result from not enjoying the personal side of life at a young age as well.

#3 – Nature of the Beast – As long as I can remember I have always been a “busy” person.  In HS, I was involved heavily in music and sports, and in college I had work, school and playing music.  Along with those things, I have always had close relationships with my friends and family.  When I moved to PA for my career and to essentially help build a company, all of a sudden my focus that was once spread over many verticals became focused.  I think this made it very easy to become extremely intense with work and focusing my time and effort into those aspects of my life.

#4 – Long-term Provisions – My life goals have always included being able to provide for my family in a comfortable fashion.  Though financial stability leads to a conversation of its own, my thoughts tend to fall to the side of  - not having to wonder where the net bill is coming from, takes a lot of stress out of a relationship!  I do realize money does not solve all problems and creates many of its own, it is important for me to know I can be a provider and offer a comfortable lifestyle to my future wife and children.

All in all, I guess I realize that my struggle to find life’s balance is not much different than anyone else.  In fact, in many ways, I feel finding that “balance” is the “key to life”.  

Life’s dichotomous journey takes us down paths both trodden and those unpaved, but feel content it always leaves an option to traverse down another direction or seek out a new adventure.  There is no answer or magical solution, just opportunities for you to personally dismantle its web of discovery and find your own way.

 - Ben

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Throughout my life I have had several blogs and journals that have come and go, and I currently run my company’s blog but needed a place to share my own personal thoughts and experiences with others who may be interested or in similar situations.  It is a way for me to share my journey through life as a member of Gen Y and the group of people who want to make their own way, rather than struggle to play someone else’s game.  I have imported posts from my other blogs as well as some of my own journal entries compiling them into a single format, this blog.

I guess you can say that I have always been obsessed with success.  The type of success that comes from doing something you are passionate about and being driven by that passion.  Just to clarify, I think success and money are not correlated and one is not representative of the other.  I have known many successful jazz musicians full of passion who make less than 50k a year.  Also, how can you put a financial worth on having a successful relationship with your family or friends?  That being said, I always remember what someone once told me when I was going through confirmation at church and I asked for advice about money – “Do what you love and the money will come. “ You will out-perform others who perform their job solely for the paycheck and be able to sustain and increase your productivity for much longer because of that passion.

I have always been interested in what makes people successful and finding the so-called “balance” in life.  Maybe it is the Gen Y in me or maybe not, but I have always felt I can have both success in my professional life and success in my personal life.  As I have gotten older and started to live the “startup” life, I have begun to realize how difficult it is to find this “balance.”  When I moved to PA from TX leaving my family, girlfriend and life-long friends it really hit home.  Though there are many days when I am filled with guilt knowing what my parents are going through with my dad’s illness or knowing how abandoned my girlfriend must feel at times, I truly believe it is possible to make it work.  As long as it is temporary!

I know that many other Gen Y’ers are going through the same thing, as they graduate and re-locate for the best opportunities.  Adding to the stress of being away, when you work for a small company or startup you are often traveling or working long hours throughout the week and many weekends.  Work begins to blend with life and life begins to blend with work…not exactly a stress reliever for the personal side of things.  Several times I have met “single serving friends” on airplanes or train/subway rides and the question of “how do you do it” always seems to surface.  The question usually is in regard to being in a long-distance relationship and my answers generally revolve around the same key elements:

 - Trust  - Not just knowing that you are both committed to the relationship, but also the trust that whatever you are doing in your career life benefits your personal life and relationship.  This is important and is one of the keys to making it work.

 - Understanding – Anyone who has been in a serious relationship or a long distance relationship knows that having a significant other that is “understanding” makes all of the difference.  If my girlfriend was not so ridiculously “understanding,” I am not sure how it would work.  Unfortunately, most often, and unfairly so, the person who did not move away or is not living the startup life has to be the most “understanding.”

 - Commitment – To me, Commitment is different than trust.  In a way, they are symbiotic.  Being committed to making it work is a must-have for someone in the startup life or long-distance relationship.  Times get hard, really hard, and sometimes it may seem like the only thing you have is love and commitment, but if your are strong in your commitment to each other and the love is genuine, then you will make it through the tough times.  After all it does go in cycles regarding the easy and hard times.

 - Support – Whether you are making a career change, re-location, starting a business or really any major change, it requires a tremendous amount of support.  Your friends will tell you that you are crazy.  Your family may or may not agree or understand what you are doing, and at times you will feel completely alone.  The support from your significant other can often be the most powerful “pick me up” out there.  Remember this goes both ways!  As you are traveling around and trying to make your business successful, your boyfriend or girlfriend, wife or husband have a void in their life that used to be filled with spending time with you.  It is easy to forget that when you begin to gain traction with your career and it starts to take over more and more of your life.

I tell people those things and one time a businessman on a train from DC said, “well aren’t those the keys to any relationship?”  My reply was “yes, but now take away seeing each other every day, going out with friends, sitting down together to watch a movie, or just holding hands and you can see how increasingly important those things become.”  All in all, I feel blessed and lucky.  Blessed that I have family and friends who support what I am doing and lucky enough to have a girlfriend who can tolerate my absolutely crazy life and still supports me trying to do things that make it even crazier.  Life truly is about the relationships you make, and when you look at it, they are not very different from a strong business – find someone who you geuinely want to work with, ride out the lows to get to the highs, communicate effectively, share in the joys and sorrows, don’t ever lose sight of the end goal and sometimes just take a minute and smile as you look back at how far you have come.

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